i've been down and
i'm wondering why
these little black clouds
keep walking around
with me
it wastes time
and i'd rather be high
think i'll walk me outside
and buy a rainbow smile
but be free
they're all free
so maybe tomorrow
i'll find my way home.


maybe tomorrow-stereophonics.


wicker park.the movie.brilliance.the soundtrack.absolute awesome-O.
how all e songs are so apt to e emotions that flow throughout e movie.


all these people drinking lover's spit
swallowing words while giving head
they listen to teeth to learn how to quit
tied to a night they never met
you know it's time
that we grow old and do some shit
i like it all that way.


lover's spit-broken social scene.


i love it when a movie stimulates me.
recommendations pls.for such artyfarty shows.esp those saturated with lust/love/wealth/e filth of it all.lusted with reasons.loving without reasons.mix them with e seductions of money.e final concoction-absolute filth.i love.*licks lips.

bitchfit.


this is a once a mth affair.in conjuction with e other monthly occurence.


you're pathetic.
as loudmouthed and uncouthed you are,
you shamelessly putforth yourself as a victim while illustrating your sobstory.
so pitiable.
it disgusts me to witness you leeching on others,
unable to stand up for yourself.
how pathetic can you be?
direct confrontations work best with me.
why involve others when it's only between us?
spreadspreadspread your sobstory far and wide.
i cant e least be bothered with what is being said.
you're such a shame.
such a disgrace.
as much as i need to release and vent,
you're not worth any mere mention on this space in this column.
it's too exclusive for you.
as much as i wld want it to be evident that it's directed at you knowing that you'd be reading this,
even as i express and verbalize my discontentment in my simplest form of expression,
i doubt it's within your grasp of comprehension.
you wont even realise it's you i'm referring to as your eyes scan through my concealed connotations.
i'm watching you.
any indifference shown will be noticed, indicating that you're acknowledging all of e above.
think again.
don't think so highly of yourself.
don't give yourself too much credit.



oh.and ms-i-do-not-have-originality-in-me-and-love-to-emulate-other's-style-as-my-own-because-i-dont-have-any strikes once and again.*yawn.what's new?what else are you capable of?i wonder when you'll ever get sick of yourself.
thrill me.
but i doubt your ever-so-pablum persona*enormous yawn* can even raise any reaction from me.


i wonder who is more detestable.
i think it's e latter.


a release is good.

happy 21st to my sweetest cupcake that i'm constantly craving for-cillia.


so it's been 2 years.frm colleagues to closestlove. frm having a crazy mr mamood storming up e office of singapore powers demanding to kill you to being totally nuts abt having you in my life.been through different men, hairstyles, social circles, lifestyles, bust sizes, waist expansions/contractions and yet there's a common love that we have for each other. not seeing each other on a regular basis does not dilute e intensity of how passionate i feel for you. those were e times when i'd travel to clementi to your place and sing jay chou's rooftop together. and infecting you with my infatuation with south park ever since e j-o-o joke. e times when we'd sit and talk for hours over anything and everything. i totally dig you despite being as different as night and day and day and night. as reflected in our different preferences in men (with you preferring metrosexuals with good dress senses and me going gaga over those who cant be bothered with their looks but with nice shoulders of cos.which is gd cos i'll never like e men you like/love/lust over), and different fashion statements (with you being totally eclectic and funkydunky and me being boring and timeless with classic black and whites and occasional explorations with other colors), we bond together like tight leather bondage.cuffed together.kinky are we. and i know this mutual love will continue for as long as it will last.


i love you cillia.
*hugs and wetkisses.

*feast your eyes.


walawala's on boxing day.


brewerkz on postboxing day.


2days before alvi left.


e day before alvi left.

i'm not too psyched abt e new yr.
it cld be because i didnt kickstart e new yr at some raveofaparty in e company of my lovelies at rouge.
none of e usual merrymaking which i wld have loved and preferred to end 2004.
instead.e eve was spent playing nurse to the sickone.
disclaimer:do not think kinky.pardon the heavy saturation of connotions otherwise.
cldnt possibly have enjoyed myself knowing that he was sick and viralstricken.
what cld be worst than falling sick on nye and down with fever/bodyaches/flu/rashes/add all of them up/equals to dengue.poor boy.
counted down to e new yr with his parents opening all e windows and switching on all e lights in e hse as a beginning to a bright new yr.
so basically it was a super subdued lowkey affair.
an indication for me to mellow down this yr maybe?
i start off e yr with nulled expectations.


happy 2005.